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Humour: mental asylum

During a visit to a mental asylum, a visitor asked the director what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionalized.

“Well,” said Director Epstein, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.”

“Oh, I understand,” said the visitor. “A normal person would use the bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the teacup.”

“No.” said the director, “A normal person would pull the plug.

Experiments that point to a new understanding of cancer. By Mina Bissell

TALKS

For decades, researcher Mina Bissell pursued a revolutionary idea — that a cancer cell doesn’t automatically become a tumor, but rather, depends on surrounding cells (its microenvironment) for cues on how to develop. She shares the two key experiments that proved the prevailing wisdom about cancer growth was wrong.

Mina Bissell studies how cancer interacts with our bodies, searching for clues to how cancer’s microenvironment influences its growth. Full bio »

Kaspersky Lab and ITU Research Reveals New Advanced Cyber Threat

Kaspersky Lab announces the discovery of a highly sophisticated malicious program that is actively being used as a cyber weapon attacking entities in several countries. The complexity and functionality of the newly discovered malicious program exceed those of all other cyber menaces known to date.

The malware was discovered by Kaspersky Lab’s experts during an investigation prompted by the International Telecommunication Union (ITU). The malicious program, detected as Worm.Win32.Flame by Kaspersky Lab’s security products, is designed to carry out cyber espionage. It can steal valuable information, including but not limited to computer display contents, information about targeted systems, stored files, contact data and even audio conversations.

The independent research was initiated by ITU and Kaspersky Lab after a series of incidents with another, still unknown, destructive malware program – codenamed Wiper – which deleted data on a number of computers in the Western Asia region. This particular malware is yet to be discovered, but during the analysis of these incidents, Kaspersky Lab’s experts, in coordination with ITU, came across a new type of malware, now known as Flame. Preliminary findings indicate that this malware has been “in the wild” for more than two years - since March 2010. Due to its extreme complexity, plus the targeted nature of the attacks, no security software detected it.

Although the features of Flame differ compared with those of previous notable cyber weapons such as Duqu and Stuxnet, the geography of attacks, use of specific software vulnerabilities, and the fact that only selected computers are being targeted all indicate that Flame belongs to the same category of super-cyberweapons. 
Commenting on uncovering Flame, Eugene Kaspersky, CEO and co-founder of Kaspersky Lab, said: “The risk of cyber warfare has been one of the most serious topics in the field of information security for several years now. Stuxnet and Duqu belonged to a single chain of attacks, which raised cyberwar-related concerns worldwide. The Flame malware looks to be another phase in this war, and it’s important to understand that such cyber weapons can easily be used against any country. Unlike with conventional warfare, the more developed countries are actually the most vulnerable in this case.”

The primary purpose of Flame appears to be cyber espionage, by stealing information from infected machines. Such information is then sent to a network of command-and-control servers located in many different parts of the world. The diverse nature of the stolen information, which can include documents, screenshots, audio recordings and interception of network traffic, makes it one of the most advanced and complete attack-toolkits ever discovered. The exact infection vector has still to be revealed, but it is already clear that Flame has the ability to replicate over a local network using several methods, including the same printer vulnerability and USB infection method exploited by Stuxnet.

Alexander Gostev, Chief Security Expert at Kaspersky Lab, commented: “The preliminary findings of the research, conducted upon an urgent request from ITU, confirm the highly targeted nature of this malicious program. One of the most alarming facts is that the Flame cyber-attack campaign is currently in its active phase, and its operator is consistently surveilling infected systems, collecting information and targeting new systems to accomplish its unknown goals.”

Kaspersky Lab’s experts are currently conducting deeper analysis of Flame. Over the coming days a series of blog posts will reveal more details of the new threat as they become known. For now what is known is that it consists of multiple modules and is made up of several megabytes of executable code in total - making it around 20 times larger than Stuxnet, meaning that analysing this cyber weapon requires a large team of top-tier security experts and reverse engineers with vast experience in the cyber defence field.

ITU will use the ITU-IMPACT network, consisting of 142 countries and several industry players, including Kaspersky Lab, to alert governments and the technical community about this cyber threat, and to expedite the technical analysis.

Further details can be found in the Flame FAQ prepared by Kaspersky Lab’s security researchers at Securelist.com.

Californication. By 2 CELLOS

Ted Logo

TALKS

Joshua Foer: Feats of memory anyone can do

There are people who can quickly memorize lists of thousands of numbers, the order of all the cards in a deck (or ten!), and much more. Science writer Joshua Foer describes the technique — called the memory palace — and shows off its most remarkable feature: anyone can learn how to use it, including him.

Joshua Foer is a science writer who ‘accidentally’ won the U.S. Memory Championship. Full bio »

It’s Teacher Appreciation Week in the USA, and Jimmy Kimmel’s gift to educators across America was an opportunity to give their students’ parents a piece of their minds.

[jimmykimmel]

Mike Fay’s Pitcairn Journal: Return to Pitcairn. Posted by Andrew Howley

EJ-logo-white.jpg

2 April 2012

I can hardly believe it: the Claymore headed back to Polynesia and I got left behind here on Pitcairn for 10 days. How cool is that? 10 whole days on the home of the Bounty buccaneers.

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Gary Larson cartoon incident
One of cartoonist Gary Larson’s more famous cartoons shows two chimpanzees grooming. One finds a blonde human hair on the other and inquires, “Conducting a little more ‘research’ with that Jane Goodall tramp?” The Jane Goodall Institute thought this was in bad taste, and had their lawyers draft a letter to Larson and his distribution syndicate, in which they described the cartoon as an “atrocity”. They were stymied by Goodall herself, who revealed that she found the cartoon amusing. Since then, all profits from sales of a shirt featuring this cartoon go to the Jane Goodall Institute. Goodall wrote a preface to The Far Side Gallery 5, detailing her version of the controversy. She praised Larson’s creative ideas, which often compare and contrast the behavior of humans and animals. In 1988, Larson visited Gombe.

Gary Larson cartoon incident

One of cartoonist Gary Larson’s more famous cartoons shows two chimpanzees grooming. One finds a blonde human hair on the other and inquires, “Conducting a little more ‘research’ with that Jane Goodall tramp?” The Jane Goodall Institute thought this was in bad taste, and had their lawyers draft a letter to Larson and his distribution syndicate, in which they described the cartoon as an “atrocity”. They were stymied by Goodall herself, who revealed that she found the cartoon amusing. Since then, all profits from sales of a shirt featuring this cartoon go to the Jane Goodall Institute. Goodall wrote a preface to The Far Side Gallery 5, detailing her version of the controversy. She praised Larson’s creative ideas, which often compare and contrast the behavior of humans and animals. In 1988, Larson visited Gombe.

Princess Bride in Silicon Valley: When G-Male — the imagined Google version of the perfect boyfriend — meets Siri — the imagined Apple version of the perfect girlfriend — data flies.

[thanks, andrea! comediva]

Together, Avaaz members are changing the way the world works — bringing people-powered politics to pressing issues around the world.

This is your chance to create and share a petition about the issue that matters most to you — and win. It can be in your backyard, neighbourhood, city, state or beyond: no idea is too big or small.

And you don’t need experience, or expertise. You only need to know why it’s important — everything else we can help you learn along the way.

Deadpan 15-year-old stand-up comedian

Snippet from Pulp Shakespeare (AKA Bard Fiction) — a re-imagining of Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction as a Shakespearean play.

A production of the full version will be performed at Chicago’s Greenhouse Theater Center starting March 16th.

See Also: Tempests — a Shakespearean retelling of Aliens.

[reddit.]

Computer Humour: No Sound Support

Bill Stebbins tells of his experience as a customer:

I recently purchased a new PC from one of the major computer manufacturers. I placed my order via the web but asked for them to call me for my credit card information.

So, after a couple days of phone tag, I got in touch with the saleswoman handling my account. I was thinking I’d just give her my credit card number and be on my way.

Almost.

Saleswoman: “Do you realize that the modem you’ve chosen doesn’t have sound support?”

Customer: “What exactly does a ‘modem with no sound support’ mean?”

Saleswoman: “It means that if you go to a web page that has a movie or sound file, you won’t be able to hear it.”

Customer: “What does the modem have to do with that?”

Saleswoman: “Well, sir, the modem is what connects your computer to the Internet.”

Customer: “So, you’re telling me that this particular modem scans the TCP/IP packets passing through it for those belonging to any sound application and filters them out?”

Saleswoman: “Yes.”

Customer: “How does it accomplish this feat?”

Saleswoman: “I’m not technical enough to answer that. Please hold.”

I stayed on hold for five minutes and hung up.

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